“Well, conditions are quite harsh here. We’re advising all of our clients to invest all their resources into preserved goods and firearms.” This piece of wise counsel comes from the Brain Gremlin – a lab-engineered, talking, bespectacled member of the oozy monster mob that infests Manhattan’s ultra-modern Clamp Tower skyscraper in director Joe Dante’s madcap sequel Gremlins 2: The New Batch. At first glance, it’s simply an investment tip from one monster to another. But, curiously, it’s also pretty solid existential counsel. Truly, hear me out.
When things go bad, the most counterproductive action you can do is view events with undue solemnity. The Brain Gremlin comprehends this. Indeed, a large portion of the fang-bearing creatures that inhabit Dante’s unrestrained 1990 movie (arguably his best) possess the same sly, self-aware funny bone regarding the indistinct border separating the mundane and absolute bedlam. It’s a single component of Gremlins 2: The New Batch that maintains my loyalty – and with the passage of time, it’s the theme that resonates the most.
Understandably, my connection with this movie wasn’t born on such an deeply thoughtful note. Growing up, we only had a few scratched-up video tapes at home. Included within that collection were Gremlins and its second chapter, the latter housed in a thick former-rental sleeve likely purchased from an off-brand video shop and featuring growling monsters on its tattered front. I was instantly captivated and these films quickly proceeded inserting themselves inside my young, susceptible psyche. From then on, they became an near-everyday part of my youthful watching schedule.
Dante’s initial installment usually receives all the plaudits, thanks mostly because of its status as a partly frightening holiday classic – and don’t get me wrong, I’ve watched Gremlins an incalculable number of times. Nevertheless, its follow-up rarely gets the same level of high regard, which feels unjust. As a kid, I’d always seize the chance to watch Gremlins 2. During long summer holidays, I’d retreat into the house and stick it on. When I obtained my very own TV-VHS combo unit, it remained on repeat in my bedroom. Gradually, it became deeply rooted in my mindset. If my parents observed this fixation, they didn’t seem to mind.
As I grew, new insights rewarded repeat viewings, heightening the enjoyment of watching diminutive verdant beasts happily vandalize a New York high-rise. I learned the future-focused property magnate and Clamp Tower owner, Daniel Clamp (John Glover), was modeled closely on the later-to-be-president Donald Trump, with his red-headed employee Marla (Haviland Morris) alluding to his one-time partner Marla Maples. Thankfully, Clamp has more heart than his genuine article inspiration.
The “doomsday” video Clamp plays during maximum monster mayhem? I discovered it was inspired by a actual “Doomsday” video produced by the CNN boss Ted Turner should the world actually met its demise. I noticed how Dante went out of his way to film alternate cuts of a self-aware scene where Gremlins seize control of the exact movie you are viewing. One for cinemas, a separate one for tape and broadcast, each delivering a smirking slice of fourth-wall-breaking cultural alchemy prior to the concept being mainstream.
While it was creature designer Rick Baker’s gloriously nasty-looking creatures that caught my eye as a child, this deeper gold maintained my fascination as an adult. Ultimately, I even interviewed Dante about it myself and he had no qualms telling me he made the movie with the specific aim of ridiculing those who loved its absurd-yet-genuine predecessor and wanted more. “We were going to make fun of the fact you came to see it,” he cheerfully disclosed. This Looney Tunes-esque rebelliousness and determination to not take his sequel as solemnly as his Warner Bros bosses evidently expected, only deepened my appreciation further.
When I experienced a unexpected loss in the family not long ago, I was surprised to find that, during my deepest grief, all I desired to do was sit and watch Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Strange, isn’t it? Maybe not. The nostalgic calm it provided was necessary to weaken my mind’s sadness sludge – but the perspectives it had bestowed upon me as an adult were just as useful.
Like Gremlins rampaging through a genetics laboratory, there’s particular aspects in life you just can’t control. Dante understands this. The Brain Gremlin agrees completely. Sometimes, you have to follow their example: accept the turmoil, commit your entire being into preserved goods and firearms and try not to take things too seriously.
It’s powerful existential guidance from a highly unexpected fountain – and it’s why Gremlins 2: The New Batch will eternally stand as my comfort movie.
A London-based tech analyst and writer with over a decade of experience covering digital transformation and startup ecosystems across Europe.